A Murder in my family. My story. Part 2

HOW I RECEIVED THE NEWS

I was single. My dad was a widower. Neither of us had ever been on a cruise and often talked about how fun it would be. We had hoped that my siblings and their spouses, maybe even my adult sons would want to plan and go on a cruise as well. It just didn’t work out for the rest of the family, whether it was because of work or just not being able to afford it at the time. My dad and I planned the cruise about a year in advance. We had our sights set on the Caribbean / Bahamas. The months seemed to drag on forever, just waiting for March. We both did research and felt like we were prepared. I had fun buying new clothes and shoes for the trip. Planning what to do on each island we stopped at was exciting. As the time grew closer, I got increasingly nervous. I’m sure that is normal for most people. I was talking with Damon a few days before we left. I was telling him that I wished he was coming too. He said he would have, but he knew he wouldn’t be able to get his room close to ours. I told him, it didn’t matter where his room was, because we won’t be in the rooms most of the time. We agreed… the next trip he would come too.

The morning came… on the day we would be leaving for our trip. Dad and I were double checking to be certain we had packed everything on our lists. I could hear Chad and dad talking in the other room about going to breakfast. Soon Chad came and asked if I would like to go with them… I must have had a stressed looked on my face because he then said “Come on, it will be the last time… (then there was a pause, just for a second, and it was probably nothing but I often think about that sentence) … you will have breakfast with dad in Utah for a while.”  I agreed and the three of us went out for breakfast. We talked about the cruise Chad had taken his oldest son on for his graduation trip. Chad gave us some last-minute tips and reminded us to take lots of pictures. Later that day, dad and I were gathering our bags together in the dining room, we would be leaving in just 10 minutes. Dad, Damon and I were standing there in the room.  I said “Maybe I should leave a note in the kitchen saying Please make sure to clean up before we get back home” then I mumbled… “Never mind, I don’t want to start anything.”  Damon immediately was upset and said, “Why the f*** wont anyone confront him!?” I ‘shushed’ him… which made him more upset. (Damon never dropped the f-bomb in front of me, ever… let alone his grandpa. I just didn’t have time for an argument… we were leaving within minutes.) Dad didn’t say anything.  We gathered our bags and loaded them in the truck. Damon rode with us to the airport, so he could drive the truck back home and save us parking fees. On the ride to the airport, it was quiet. Damon was in the backseat. Dad said, “We have a little time, anyone want to stop for a burger?” I said “No.” Damon said quietly “I’m good.” Those were the only words Damon said the entire time. Once we arrived at the airport, dad handed $20 to Damon for the parking fee. Damon walked around and got in the drivers’ seat… before I shut my door I said “Be good. I love you.” He didn’t respond, just drove away. On any normal day, when I wasn’t rushing to get on a flight to a cruise, I was already nervous about… I think I would have paid more attention to the way he was acting. I just thought he was in a mood because I ‘shushed’ him.

We made it on to the cruise ship.  We were on the Carnival Glory. We stopped at several islands and went on excursions on each one. It was a full trip, always busy. On one of our stops I checked my phone and had a slight signal, I looked quickly on Facebook and saw that Chad had posted a video of his General Lee driving away from the house. The caption said “It’s sold” (or something close to that). I had forgotten that he had to have it sold by a certain date and give his ex-wife half of the money. It was part of their divorce. My heart sank – just knowing how much he loved that car. I was sad he had to part with it. I thought, I’m sure he is so sad right now; on top of everything else going on in his life.  The last day of our cruise was just the ship heading back to port, a day at sea, with no stops. Around 3 pm Atlantic time I decided I was going to look for an empty lounge chair and get some sun out on the deck and relax, soak it up while I could. Dad said he wanted to go back to the room to take a nap.  I was surprised, this was the first time he had wanted to go take a nap the entire cruise. Just a short 15 minutes after dad had left me to go back to the room… he was tapping me on the shoulder. I was a little confused. He said “Sharon, I need you to come back to the room. I am not feeling well.” I was instantly worried; this was totally out of character for him. I got up and followed him. I was wanting to ask him questions, but he was walking so fast I couldn’t. I remember getting on the elevator and it kept stopping at every floor… each floor I was getting more annoyed. Thinking “My dad is sick & we need to get back to the room quickly.” We eventually got back to the room, I started with questions “What’s wrong? What can I do to help?” and my dad said “I need you to sit down.” So, I sat in the chair, increasingly confused, thinking “If he is sick, why is he asking me to sit down?” Then he knelt down in front of me, took off his glasses and held my hands. Looking me straight in the eyes he said “There has been an accident at home. Damon and Chad are dead.” I just stared; I don’t think I said anything… I just stared. Every scenario running through my mind. “A fire, there must have been a fire.” was my first thought. Then dad said, “Right now, from the looks of things, it appears to be a murder – suicide.” I thought… “What? No… that doesn’t make sense at all.” I can’t even put into words exactly what it felt like. My mind was racing… memories, conversations with each of them, birthday parties, Christmas’s, family vacations, camping trips. I couldn’t wrap my head around it. Then he said, “It looks like Damon shot Chad and then himself. Chad was found in his own bed and Damon was found out by Kato’s corral. Nobody knows why it happened.” I don’t think I said much, I just remember my mind racing with questions, scenarios and not believing any of this could be true. When my dad had gone back to the room earlier to take a nap, he received a call from my brother in law. My brother in law was the one that found Chad. At that time, we really were not told anything else… nobody was sure what had caused it.

Dad and I decided we needed to go and speak with guest services on the ship to see if there was any way to help us get home faster. Dad did all of the talking, I just sat there with tears rolling down my face in confusion and shock. The woman who helped us was amazing. She got our flight changed to an earlier one, she also arranged for us to be the first off the ship so we could make the early flight. She turned on free Wi-Fi for us. (We hadn’t signed up for the wifi package. Our phones were useless before this) So we could communicate with our family at home. Honestly, I was in such complete shock, I remember not being able to even work my own phone, it was like my brain was shut off.

Later that night. Not many other people were out, most were in their rooms. I was sitting in the casino area of the ship, on a bench with a big window overlooking the ocean. I remember staring out into the night and just trying to figure it all out. It was so overwhelming. A couple times the thought went through my mind to jump overboard… It sounds crazy, but at that moment I couldn’t handle what was rushing through my mind. It was just too horrible to deal with. “I can’t handle this!” I thought. Chad’s children will have to grow up without him. They need him. Damon was so young and had so much ahead of him… and now he is just… gone. I can’t imagine going through life without either of them. Just about that time dad came and found me and sat by me. We didn’t talk much; we were both just in complete shock. We had so many unanswered questions. We just wanted to be back home with our family. I had a message buzz through on my phone. It was a friend saying they just saw the news. “It’s on the news?” I asked, he said yes and sent me the link. It all just seemed unreal… my family is on the news.

We got off the ship the next morning and made it to the plane. That flight seemed so long. I remember getting up to go to the back of the plane to use the restroom. When I came out, the food cart was between me and my seat… there was no way to get to my seat until the cart moved. I stood there waiting and crying. I couldn’t stop crying, I stood there for about 20 minutes. There was a little boy there in that last seat that kept looking at me, probably wondering why I was sad. All I could think when I saw his little face looking at me was – MY little boy is gone. Why and how could my sweet boy do such a thing? Never in a million years would such a thing ever cross my mind… I just couldn’t understand.  We eventually made it back to the airport at home, Damon was supposed to pick us up. Instead, we were met with most of our family… they all came to get us.  You could see in their eyes; they all were exhausted – just worn down. I had never been so happy to see my family – I needed them so much right now. We all needed each other. The hug I needed the most was from my oldest son, thank goodness he was there. When we got into the truck, the same one Damon had ridden with us to the airport in, I remember seeing the $20 bill and the parking receipt from when he dropped us off. It was tucked just under the dash mat. Tears rolled down my cheeks as I thought… Damon was the last one to touch this.

I couldn’t go home, neither could dad. We were not ready to see the house yet. Since we had luggage from our trip… we camped out at my other brother’s home. He and my sister in law said we could stay as long as we needed to. Their house became the hub. Our extended family, people from church, friends… everyone, came there to see us and talk. Once we had the family all together, we wanted to hear how it all happened the day before. My sister had seen a Facebook post from Damon that was very alarming. She had called her husband to go check on him since he was off work that day and lived only a few miles away from us. (My brother in law was very close to Chad, they worked together and carpooled) He went through the house frantically looking for Damon and eventually opened Chad’s bedroom door. At first, he thought he was looking at Damon in the bed… until he noticed the thick hair on his arms. At that point he realized it was Chad in the bed; Chad had been shot several times. Once the police arrived, they found Damon’s body laying on the side driveway (extra driveway to the back of property) … over by Kato’s corral.  

 I think I will stop here for now and continue with the story next week.